Mashallah, I never imagained when I was younger that I would be a grandparent, I never though that far ahead and it was hard enough being a teenager and parent , let alone a grandparent.
Many moons have since passed and alhmdulilah I am still here and alhamdulilah now within the fold of Islam.Why is this so important you may asked? Being a muslim has empowered me to stop drinking, stop smoking, stop casual sex, stop having interest on my money(ribr) and getting of debt, encouraged good relationship with family and friend, all these things lead to a more peaceful life and so make parenting easier.
Not to long ago I realised that begin a parent is an ongoing job, it doesnt stop when your children are 16 or 18, you cant just throw them out of the nest and wipe your hands of them. I supposed you could if you were desperate, heartless or godless but in reality they will need our help for many years to come.
Now I am not one of those mums who feel useless unless I have a mop in my hand, no way, I love my own head space and studying and reading, housework is something that has to be done but it doesnt validate my worth as a woman. However as a grandma the mundane is such a joy, for example washing baby clothes, I had to phone a friend and say”guess what? there are little tiny clothes in my house again! alhmdulilah”
A native american indian friend of mine Alyson Shaw said ” Grandchildren are the gift for surviving parenthood!”So true mashallah!
Let us not fool ourselves in some self denial bubble by sweeping reality under the carpet,
” being a parent is hard.” It moulds you from being a child to a fully fledged adult in so many ways, especially if you choose to get fully involved, as some men and woman like to flitt off to university or work and do not help in the house or with the children because “they pay for everything” or “mummy can do it !”
hmmmmm, its not very Islamic, the Prophet Muhammad, salah la alahi wa salem used to help around the house and played with children, even playing with them is something to keep them occupied while mum has a pamper session in the bath or cooks something nice in peace, not half worrying where the little ones are or what are they getting up to.
Talking about that , inshallah I am going to have to get some baby gates soon.
I am not as young as I used to be and its true , one of the beauties of being a Nannie is giving them back, I realised though I am on 24hour last minute call.
“MUUUUM!” It never ends, your children still call asking for help with this and that, advice on how to make shepherd pie or apple crumble.
I have to say I’m in love, with my grandchild, alhdulilah, the joy in my life mashallah!