By Karimah bint Dawoud, Muslim chaplain, studying Imam Al Ghazali,
One of my teacher’s made me aware that Imam Al Ghazali wrote about 7 Types Of Women you should not marry.I decided to research this as I had already started writing about different types of men I have married or met in potential marriage partner meetings. Here is my tongue in cheek breaking it down baby!
THE BEARDED TEASER
The bearded teaser is a slippery character that needs to be pinned into a corner, and confronted on his bull, he has lyrics like honey but a heart made of jelly and that’s being polite, on the darker side, he’s one of those brothers whois already married or engaged BUT says he’s open to the idea of polygamy, talks a good game but that’s all it is to him – a game.
THE QUALITY STREET MAN
He believes he is made for sharing, he hasn’t even got one wife but in the process of talking to you about marriage, he’s already talking about having another wife as well, because in his words” he is made for sharing” like the BEARDED TEASER , he is all talk and no trousers, Alhamdulillah he is wearing thobe! Phew!
MR LOVER MAN
In the process of mature conversation before marriage, this brother tells you he expects sex five times a day, if he was celibate and fearing of Allah, he wouldn’t be getting any sex as a single man, so this extremist is into fantasyand trapped by his star sign, sadly will get him nowhere, unrealistic expectations and randomly texes you from mystery number to say “I’M REALLY HORNY CAN YOU HELP?” You have to trick him using a bait of “I lost my phone so I don’t know who this is, so how can I help you” when he reveals his identity, then you can tell him TO FEAR ALLAH
MR “IT WASN’T ME”
Ohhh, this one could have you pulling your hair out if you don’t have better things to do like washing your hair,washing your hair is the more positive option.
When asked about his failed marriages and relationship, it was “ALWAYS HER FAULT, IT WASN’T ME!” this character is best left well alone after a suggestion to go seek some counseling .He will still throw his toys out of the pram, at you, and go marry another scheming liar who tells him what he wants to hear till she rinses him out once again, when will these boys learn?
He is a bit like THE BEARDED TEASER but more sinister and vulgar, I had the experience of meeting a few of these creatures that seems to have strong physical build but very low self-esteem or self-knowledge. These fellows have problems accepting that women have intelligence as well as men and see women as sponges or clean slates that need to be lecturer and oppressed with their knowledge, though it’s too often not that great. They tend to shout and roar a lot; tell you of their physical activities which can vary and manipulate you by telling you that if things get socially bad, you women who think you are independent are going to need us because such and such vulgar things are going to happen to you otherwise! Hmmmmm. This idiot is sometimes combined with MR QUALITY STREET who is often too busy going to developing countries, marrying women that need a passport, that they won’t be around to help you in any way anyways, Alhamdulillah Allah is sufficient for us ameen
MR BITCH is like being married to jealous girlfriend, he really likes you, loves you like crazy but doesn’t show it unless it in the bedroom, secretly he wishes he was you as he finds you so attractive but he resents the fact that you have been blessed more by Allah. His strategy is to always put you down and withhold praise and encouragement, he’ll even go so far to say that he won’t be giving you ad compliment, he moans all the time about your cooking house work in order to pull you down a peg or two. He needs to be the star in any relationship but deep down he is not attracted to the women he ends up with as he finds them less than him, this one is really confused.
MR I LOVE MYSELF TOOO MUCH
This one is really funny but only if you are ovulating. If you have PMT or are menopausal please avoid this one but by menopause you would probably come to your sense about this one unless you are taking HRT. This one is easy to recognize though there are some more subtle species. He has the latest Mohican gelled hair style, the pointiest or long square toed shoes.There is the rough neck version who has the batty man low slung jeans, over Versace underpants look as well. They have to be Versace or some known designer.His jeans are usually draggin on the pavement. Physical fitness is really important to this brother, I have met a few of these that are the “Thobe Let Me Stroke My Beard While You Adore Me” types, you have to run after this man, he is too busy stroking his beard to make an effort and be a man
SERIOUSLY THERE ARE MORE THAN THIS BUT THIS IS JUST MY EXPERIENCES HENCE THE FACT I AM STILL ON MY OWN, ONCE OR TWICE BITTEN, NOT SHY BUT CAUTIOUS, ALLAH IS SUFFICIENT FOR US, AMEEN